Most days, this is what my mind feels like:
|Walker Art Center - Siah Armajani’s Prayer - 1962|
I realize this all sounds really self-centered and I am well aware the world does not revolve around me, but sometimes it just heard to snap out of it and trust.
Those are just a few of the thoughts that are going through my head at the same time at any given moment. I just cannot seem to get my brain to stop.
And unfortunately, I am the queen of the spiral. Of making mountains out of molehills. Of overanalyzing (and then re-analyzing). Of worrying. That's what I do. It manifests itself in all elements of my life - from work to personal to everything in between.
I just cannot let things go. No matter how many times I hear Elsa singin' it ... I just can't seem to do it. (JK ... I don't listen to "Let it go" on repeat ... really)
Whether it is what I said on a conference call or if I locked the front door or if that car on the road was honking at me or that person's bummer who I tapped 7 years ago (true story) or that top that my mom bought me in spain 10 years ago ... I hold onto things and worry them on and on and on. It's like a scab you cannot help by pick pick pick until it bleeds.
Maybe I need more to keep me busy.
Maybe I'll try yoga (in the privacy of my own home, cause clearly in a class I would be worried about others judging my lack of skills).
Maybe I'll give that meditation app on my phone a try.
Maybe I should stop over-thinking all the things I could do and just try to go to bed.
"Try" being the operative word.